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Because I’m a masochist with too much time on my hands, I decided to take a quick look through the MUNI budget to see just how many taxpayer and rider dollars they manage to blow through in a year ( for those of you who want to follow along at home, you can take a look for yourself)
So yeah $586,000,000 is quite a number. You could buy quite a bit with that kind of dough. Of course MUNI orginally low-balled their budget by about oh, 80 Million back in February but whats a few million between friends? As Doug alluded to MUNi could also be hurting even more once all these lawsuits start rolling in. So into which rabbit hole do these hundreds of millions of dollars flow? For the most part it goes to paying the salaries of the 4300 odd employees employed by our dear MUNI with 300 million or so going to salaries and another 112 Million for their “fringe benefits”. Busting out my dusty TI-86 I calculated the average total compensation package for a MUNI employee at around $95,813. Um, yeah seems reasonable to me. How much do you feel like a sucker now. Dropping tens of thousands on a college education just so you can make 45K in advertising. Might as well just chilled and been a pimp for a few years then gotten hooked up with one of these plum MUNI jobs.
Out of curiosity I plunged even deeper into MUNI pdf land to check out some of these job decriptions to see just what exactly these folks are doing to earn 96K a year. Here is a small sample replete with standard snarky commentary from yours trully:
General Laborer
This class is the entry-level class in the laborer series. Positions involve sustained physical effort and occasional exposure to a variety of disagreeable working conditions and inclement weather.
$41,288.00 - $50,102.00 annually
Wholly shnikes. A 42K starting salary for moving heavy objects from point A to point B with no education necessary. Many poeple who have gone to college for 4 years would love to start out making that much. I can’t magine there is a shortage of “qualified” applicants for this position, so whats with the ridiculous wages? Paging first year teachers…does it anger you the guy in the MUNI coveralls moving rocks makes more then you?
Automotive Body And Fender Worker
$63,388.00 - $63,388.00 annually
Nature of work involves: some physical effort and dexterity in the use of fingers, limbs and body
Qualifications for above nature of work: not comotose, able to tie shoes
Parking Meter Repairer Supervisor I
Under direction, supervises parking meter maintenance and repair work, and performs related duties as required
55,120.00 - $67,002.00 annually
Parking Meter Repairer Supervisor: What are you doing?
Parking Meter Repairer: Fixing a parking meter.
Parking Meter Repairer Supervisor: Can you do it any faster?
Parking Meter Repairer: uh, no I don’t think so.
Parking Meter Repairer Supervisor: Ok. Carry on then.
Parking Meter Repairer: Thanks, if I need ya where will you be?
Parking Meter Repairer Supervisor: In the break room playing pool and counting my hundred dollar bills.
Gardener
Requires ability to follow oral or written instructions and cooperate with others in the performance of duties.
42,692.00 - $51,844.00 annually
A study in contrasts:
Transit Paint Shop Supervisor I
Under direction, is responsible for supervising all shop and other activities in connection with the painting of a wide variety of automotive vehicles and equipment, buildings, facilities and other properties of the municipal transit system; plans, assigns and directs the activities of subordinate personnel engaged in such work; and performs related duties as required.
Requires responsibility for: interpreting and enforcing existing methods and procedures, and developing new methods and procedures relative to the painting of automotive equipment buildings, other facilities and properties of the municipal transit system; making contacts with the general public and other departmental personnel in connection with painting activities; gathering, preparing and maintaining shop and other painting operating reports and records.
85,462.00 - $85,462.00 annually
Transit Planner III
Under general supervision, the 5289 Transit Planner III performs urban mass transit and/or transportation planning work. The essential functions of this job include: designing, analyzing and evaluating reports of transportation-related data for various urban mass transit planning or transportation planning projects and grant requests; evaluating the technical aspects of transportation projects; developing, interpreting, coordinating, carrying out and monitoring urban transit or transportation policy and planning work, including completion of complex written documents and reports; supervising the design and preparation of models, maps, charts and other graphic materials to illustrate plans and or reports; developing and evaluating proposals for planning and coordinating the implementation of transit route and service changes; preparing plans and projections of future transit, transportation, economic or demographic conditions and trends; investigating and reviewing federal and state legislation and regulations for potential impact on transit/transportation plans and programs; preparing budgets, schedules and contracts for major projects; making presentations to the community, businesses, airport tenants and/or transportation agencies to explain transit planning and transportation planning policies, procedures, regulations, programs and projects; and preparing and reviewing correspondence in response to public, Commission and/or other agency inquiries. Some positions may require possession of a valid driver license.
67,964.00 - $82,628.00 annually
Why in Gods name does the guy managing the painting of buses get paid signifigantly more then a Planner manging long term projects that affect the lives of thousands upon thousands of riders? MUNI sort out your priorities. We don’t give a shit how the buses are painted. We do, however, take great interest in bus routes, scheduling, and on time performance. Note the relation to planning and the utter lack of relation to painting a bus. Same goes for the plumber:
Plumber
Cuts, bends, assembles and installs various pipes
65,858.00 - $80,080.00 annually
This one was too good:
Executive Secretary I
Under direction, provides administrative secretarial services of a specialized and responsible nature foe (sic) a member of executive management; may supervise a moderate sized group of subordinate clerical personnel; and performs related duties as required.
47,840.00 - $58,136.00 annually
Maybe you should include in the job description a little something on “proof reading” in addition to spell checking.
Getting back to the orginal point of this post, the huge budget of MUNI, who wants to just dissolve MUNI? If we divide the budget by the number of folks in the city, that’s almost 800 bucks a year back in our pocket, not bad. Thats about 80 cab rides a year…i’m just sayin…
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